Let us love you until you love yourself.

I am watching a documentary called “hungry for change”. One because I always like to see if there is something I can learn from these people, and two because people talking about improving their lives and their weight makes me less likely to eat. It was then that one of the men spoke about joining a group where there motto was:  “Let us love you, until you love yourself.” I think this is brilliant and something a lot of the people on this site need. I can’t speak for the rest of you but I personally joined this community to find friends, to find someone who would accept my awful habits and treat me like a person again. I wanted to find people who looked at me and didn’t see my eating disorder. People who struggle with the same awful problems I do every day. I found that, as well as I found people who hate themselves as much as I hate me. I found people who shame others and people who support others; I found human beings who are beautiful and flawed and perfect exactly as they are.

I have come to the realization that I love you. I love everything about you, from your thighs to your hair to your brain to your broken and disordered thoughts. I love you for all the things that you hate about yourself. I love you for the things you do to recover and the things you do that promote your disease. I love you despite the fact we have never seen each other; I love you despite the fact we may never speak. I love you because you deserve to be loved and that means so much to me.

I understand if you can’t love yourself right now. I understand if you hate everything about yourself. You may always feel that way I can’t promise it will change. I can’t look in a mirror or step on a scale without hating myself; fuck I can go running or even watch TV without finding some way to loath my entire being.  I’m not asking you to love me, it’s more often than not I don’t feel like I deserve love; like I don’t deserve to be happy. However with or without your permission I am going to go on loving YOU, until you learn to love yourself. Because you deserve to know how it feels to have someone love you. You deserve to be happy and I truly believe that given time and having an active group of people who love you that you will learn to love yourself.

So when you beat yourself up please remember someone out here loves you, and nothing you do will change that.