I feel like I'm documenting the mind of an eating disordered metal patient. But the paitent is me and I don't know how to feel about anything. I am going to be starting Insanity again so I'm hoping it's not the start of another binging cycle. I just quit today; yesterday and the day before I binged myself back up to 140.2 pounds.
I am resisting the urge to punch myself in the face. I need some positive people in my life who are not always throwing food at me. Who don't want to go out to eat all the time or go out drinking. Why cant we have fun that doesn't involve ingesting calories?
Fuck if I know.
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