Applying for jobs is exhausting. I am
so tired and I have been eating my feelings. I am amazed that Benny
has not broken up with me yet. I SWEAR I WEIGH WAY TO MUCH. I don't
even know how much I weigh. This is bloody ridiculous. Save me. SAVE
ME NOW.
I miss the calm cool control that comes
with not eating. Rather than eating pizza and baking cakes like a
goddamn fat ass. I can't get back there, being off of my medications
is killing me. I need to start taking my diet pills but I can't until
I know that they have nothing illegal in them or even something legal
that might look like something bad on a drug test. I don't do drugs,
I really actually don't. I just need something to cull the
inessential urge to eat everything in sight. What is this really? I
hate it.
I literally spend all day going: “You
are a fat pig. You are a fat pig. You are a fat pig. OH look PIZZA.”
WHAT IS FUCKING WRONG WITH ME?
I can't even have a proper eating
disorder, I have to go on this bullshit binge series
Kill me.
More importantly I need a nap and more
importantly I need to get better. This is horrid. I want to love
myself again. Why is that so much to ask?
I really do understand you. Why don't you try some herbs insted of diet pills. They can do wonders. Google this : appetite suppressant herbs :
ReplyDeleteTry not to be so hard on yourself and remember if you did it once, you can do it again.
Hope it helps.
Thank you so much! <3
ReplyDelete