I don't care if it hurts, I want to have control. I want a perfect body, I want a perfect soul.
I find that dieting and exercise gives me control over my life that I can't get any other way.
When Matthew is mad and screaming and being hurtful I used to cry. but I've realized I can't stop him. I can't control his actions or words. The only thing I can control is me.
It's my hand and my mouth. I am the only one who can give into temptation. The only one who can fail. I am also the only one who can make myself succeed.
I've been thinking quite a bit about going public on here again and I don't think I'm going to. I think I'm just going to post up skinny friendly stuff on a different girls blog.
While I'm sure I could use the motivation of someone commenting on here I think people reading my innermost thoughts will only lead to a bad place. So for now I will let it be.
Much love and think thin!
<3
Miss Sinister
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