I found that special bullet with my name on it.

It's called life.

Get over it.

The elves are bringing kids drugs,

So Texas is the worst place to buy anything, people tell you that it is worth buying so you do and it is a total fucking bust.

FUCK PEOPLE.

I am a grumpy muffin.

People need to die.

Merry Fucking X-Mas.

Okay so everyone has been hounding me for like ever to make a fucking christmas list so you all know what kinds of crap to buy me. My only concern is that several of you will buy me the exact same thing. I don't want twelve hello kitty watches okay. So maybe you all should like talk and figure this shit out. SO THERE!

Dear wanna-be Santas,

For christmas I really want things like this:

A Hello Kitty Watch, luggage set and laptop case.

Beads to make Kandi
Cookie cutters in every shape and size
The ability to freaking fly, you know that would be boss.
To not be making this fucking list
Zombie related stuff
Stripper pole
Weapons, preferably knives and swords, but axes and maces work well too.
Lingerie
Clothes, either goth/punk/rocker or raver/kandi kid.
Rave toys

Drugs
Sex
Music
Something fun to do on my nights off
And perhaps some puppy toys for Thizzle

If you don't want to buy me something from my list then fuck the fuck off. Have a fun time and I look forward to seeing what I get for christmas. LOVE YOU! :3

-Mayhem